Saturday, January 31, 2015

I'm a Failure

It's actually a good thing, I guess, I promise you. I volunteer for a dog rescue group, Mid Atlantic Pug Rescue.  I've been a foster for them for a couple of years.  So far, I've fostered 5 dogs/pugs for MAPR...Clyde, Molly, Jake, Duke and Roscoe.  I've loved every one of them and wanted to keep every one of them but circumstances being what they were, I wasn't able to...until Roscoe.

I read a book in 2010, The Lost Dogs: Michael Vick's Dogs and Their Tale of Rescue and Redemption because I was interested in how the dogs fared after they were rescued.  Michael Vick got to play football again, but what about the dogs?  I love animals. I love football.  

After reading this book, I searched out pit bull rescue groups in my area and found Carolina Care Bullies (they have since disbanded but have broken out into new groups).  I wanted to do something, anything because I want all dogs to be the best they can be.  The need for a foster home was great and so, I became a foster parent to a dog named Lacey.  

Isn't she beautiful?  I thought so too.  But she needed so much more than I could give her. We know she was an  American Staffordshire (pit bull, like her mama) but I'm pretty sure this bady daddy was a Rhodesian Ridgeback.  She was so much like an RR it was amazing.  I loved her so much that I wished I could have kept her.  But in my small one bedroom apartment with no chance at exercise, I was not her best fit.  After a year in rescue, she finally found her forever family.

But after her, I knew that fostering a large dog in a small apartment, in a community that did not provide a dog area, would not work.  So I searched and searched until I found a pug rescue.  I wanted to continue fostering and pugs, well, I love them too.  

My first true dog love was a pug named Midget.  And to be honest, I hated her when I found out about her because she wasn't originally my dog.  She was my mom's dog.  But Midget loved me...for 13 years.  Crazy dog.  

When she left this world I swore I would never love another dog again.  But I got lonely, and my family found me Rosey, another pug.  So far, so good...she's been here with me since April of 2008. I don't know how much more time we have together but that's what rescuing an unknown is about.   

Back to MAPR and Roscoe.  Since I found them and they researched me, there's been Clyde, Molly, Jake (I got to name him and since I always wanted a dog named Jake because of a Pirates of the Mississippi song  that's the name he got!),  Duke (whose mama loves him immensely) and then Roscoe.  

Maybe it was just time. Maybe it was meant to be.  Maybe it was the "Dukes of Hazzard" catching up with me.  Roscoe.  

He fulfilled every need I had that Rosey just couldn't provide.  He loved.  And he showed it.  When he and I are together, he wants to be as close as possible.  His vision is extremely limited but he showed me that you do not need to "see" to love.  

I couldn't let him go.  Every application I got, I found something that just wasn't right...for him.  Oh sure, they would be great for any other dog but not Roscoe.  

Roscoe and I are still working things out.  And Rosey hates it when he gets all crazy and then he gets scared of her.  But right now, both are sleeping on the couch, together, snoring. loudly.  And I wouldn't have it any other way.  

Here's Rosey btw..

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